I don't like to say, 'it all came to me in a dream'.
It kind of insinuates I'm sitting on the right hand side of some deity who
funnels divine inspiration to me as I sleep. Now, that would be lovely, but I'm
sure quite improbable.
But the idea struck me out of nowhere, and I'm putting it down to that
brilliant part of me that I don't get in touch with too often, that seems to
know a hell of a lot more about who I am, and where I'm going, than I do; my
subconscious.
We moved to London on 27th September 2010. The decision hadn't been a very
well thought out one. I woke up one morning and suddenly felt that London was
something I should do and it was time to do it now. The problem was, I
had had a love affair with Manchester from the moment I'd arrived, and it was
very much my home. The people were warm, friendly and open. You could walk from
one end of the city centre to the other in about half an hour. It had theatres,
shopping centres, stadiums and was utterly cosmopolitan. It was where I'd first
discovered Spiritualism, and had met like-minded, open people - who weren't
complete nutters. It was where Liam and I had first met and fallen in love. The
home of many a messy student night. It was just a bloody cool place.
I'd stolen seven banana boxes from Asda in Moss Side and crammed all my
belongings into them. Just seven banana boxes, a suitcase or two full of my
clothes and the cat. I felt I should have accumulated more from my five years
at university. With Liam's things in there too, the white van we'd hired for
the move packed out a little more, with the parental donations of a coffee
table, a TV and a TV stand. Within a week, we'd taken the obligatory trip to
IKEA Croydon and kitted out our little box flat with all sorts of wonderfully
named Swedish cutlery trays and pillow cases. There was barely a colour scheme,
but it was our home.
A week passed. I bought an Oyster card for the underground and must have
been charged at least five times for not beeping through the gate correctly. I
walked too slowly for Londoners- either my legs were too short (I doubted that)
or Londoners walked life at a faster pace than I did. London smelt funny; dusty
or sooty - I wasn't sure.
Two weeks passed. I found myself exhausted at the end of each day, crashed
out on my Solsta IKEA sofa bed. I dreaded the commute to work; wedged
under a strange man's armpit, whilst he huffed morning breath down my neck on
the District Line was just beyond terrible. My wallet was nearly always empty,
because lunch in London for under five pounds was hard to find.
No, me and London just weren't getting on.
"I'm fed up. It's too fast in this city. It's too dirty. Plus,
everyone's so depressed!" I whinged at Liam.
He told me to be patient, we were still adjusting and that I'd get used to
it. He was right, of course. But at that time, I just could not see how I could
possibly fit in. I liked open space, open people, open possibilities.
Exactly a year ago, yesterday, I woke up suddenly - just a few minutes
before my morning alarm. I’d had a very vivid dream, and immediately reached
for the paper and pen I kept by my bedside table for these kind of mental
emergencies, and scribbled down five words.
I'm sure you can guess what they were.
In my dream I was standing in a very busy market street. People were trading
goods with stall owners, children were skipping across the cobbles, a couple
were kissing. They were all so busy that they didn't notice me. I had a hand
bell in my right hand, and started ringing it to get their attention. Nothing
changed. So I rang louder, and then louder still. I stood there in the cobbled
streets, ringing my hand bell and laughing out loud for ages. Then suddenly a little girl turned and looked at me. And as she noticed me
and began to laugh, so did her friend. It was infectious. One by one each
person in the market woke up to the sound of the bell, and everyone was
laughing.
It made me think: It only takes one thought from one person for things to
start happening. If that thought is a good one, people begin to notice. And
before you know it, everyone's caught the thought, connecting like-minds and
positive people. London might be a big smoky city, and I only one little light,
but I was going to put my light out there, and see what happened.
